It brings a smile to think of all the ways there are to go wrong when conflict arises. One can underestimate the issue or overestimate it; one can err in deciding whether or not to get involved; and if one decides to get involved, one may pick the wrong side; even if one picks the right side, one may go about it in the wrong way. Clearly, we have much to learn about conflict.
In A Different Drummer, F. Scott Peck distinguishes four stages of community: in the first stage, superficial harmony prevails, and people think that they are enjoying community. In the second stage, conflict rages, and the illusion of community is destroyed. In the third stage, people finally let go of whatever they are holding on to that blocks community. The fourth stage–which Peck reports having experienced in many a weekend workshop with a company here or an organization there–is like the descent of the Spirit of Truth at Pentecost. I take it that the surrender in question does not imply that one must necessarily change one’s beliefs or abandon one’s commitments, but relax the hold on them so that something new can dawn.
Conflict between believers who are supposed to enjoy community is especially troublesome. A divided house undermines the credibility of our testimony to the wider world. How can a follower of Jesus be true to the requirements of spiritual brotherhood while carrying out one’s responsibilities in the face of serious conflict? The Urantia Book has much to offer on the topic. After an introductory attempt to indicate a cosmic perspective, this essay will focus on how Jesus handled conflict.
I. Gleanings from Parts I-III
Stop and ponder the eternal patterns of unity and harmony. The unity of the Paradise Trinity is so perfect that the three are one. Thanks to the administration of the Eternal Son in Havona, the spiritual status and the energy states are in “perfect and perpetual balance” (83.5). How, then, do tension and conflict arise? “While infinity is on the one hand UNITY, on the other it is DIVERSITY without end or limit” (1262.1).
In the beginning, the First Source and Center created the first absolute divinity tension between deified and undeified reality (6.1). This tension creates a challenge in the evolving universes “where spirit through the mediation of mind is struggling for the mastery” (1275.1). Our finite, moral beginnings are beset with evil, but if we fail to make reasonable progress, actual evil results (1435.6); and what begins as creative tension can end in conflict where the part blocks cooperation with the creative purpose of the whole.
The First Source and Center originates another source of creative tension by articulating himself in the Paradise Trinity with seven possible viewpoints individually or in association. Each of the Seven Master Spirits represents a particular Deity function and portrays a particular Deity attitude. Even on high there is an instituted procedure for composing differences and coming to a unified group decision (188.3)!
When conflict arises in the superuniverses it is handled in a manner consistent with divine law (114#6; 372#7). There are regularly constituted tribunals (179-183). Ultimately, the freedom of the part is ultimately coordinated with the good of the whole (137#7); and there are many groups of beings who aid greatly in this process, including such beings as the universal conciliators (276#3), the social architects (432-33), the spirits of brotherhood, the souls of peace, and the spirits of trust (437). The memories of mercy teach, “You should realize that there is a great reward of personal satisfaction in being first just, next fair, then patient, then kind. And then, on that foundation, if you choose and have it in your heart, you can take the next step and really show mercy; but you cannot exhibit mercy in and of itself. . . . True mercy comes only as the beautiful climax to these preceding adjuncts to group understanding, mutual appreciation, fraternal fellowship, spiritual communion, and divine harmony” (315.1).
On the one hand, conflict is essential. “New meanings only emerge amid conflict; and conflict persists only in the face of refusal to espouse the higher values connoted in superior meanings” (1097.5). At the same time, it is crucial to deal well with the emotions of conflict. “The mental poisons of fear, anger, envy, jealousy, suspicion, and intolerance . . . tremendously interfere with the spiritual progress of the evolving soul” (1204.3). Eventually we outgrow “clashes of mind and wars of opinion” (278.3).
As we turn to Jesus, it is helpful to recognize a distinction between social and spiritual brotherhood. Social brotherhood depends upon evolutionary progress in the realms of social fraternity, intellectual cross-fertilization, ethical awakening, political wisdom, and spiritual insight. Spiritual brotherhood, by contrast, is something that can be immediately attained, and Jesus has shown us the way (597.3).
II. Conflict in the life and teachings of Jesus
I take as my key the following passage:
“It is just because the gospel of Jesus was so many-sided that within a few centuries students of the records of his teachings became divided up into so many cults and sects. This pitiful subdivision of Christian believers results from failure to discern in the Master’s manifold teachings the divine oneness of his matchless life. But someday the true believers in Jesus will not be thus spiritually divided in their attitude before unbelievers. Always we may have diversity of intellectual comprehension and interpretation, even varying degrees of socialization, but lack of spiritual brotherhood is both inexcusable and reprehensible.” (1866.3; cf. 2085.3; 2086.2)
In the venture of trying to discern analogies between some current situation and a situation in which we see Jesus acting, safety lies in remembering to regard Jesus life as a whole more as an inspiration than as a detailed example (1425.6; 1585.1). It would also be a mistake to apply the Master’s teachings for the individual directly to social and political organizations (1605.2). Only in prayer can we gain the discernment and personal guidance necessary in a given situation (1002#9).
1. Jesus’ trust in the friendly universe
Michael of Nebadon, originating in the Universal Father and the Eternal Son, in partnership with the Universe Mother Spirit, having achieved the status of a Master Son, fully represents in his relationships the unity and harmony in which we hope to participate. It is refreshing to contemplate the fact that, however remote harmony and unity may be at present, they do characterize our source and destiny.
From the standpoint of his philosophic perspective, Jesus could say, “I am absolutely assured that the entire universe is friendly to me–this all-powerful truth I insist on believing with a wholehearted trust in spite of all appearances to the contrary” (1470; 1457#2). Jesus, the “calm and happy laborer” (1509.1), is the living antidote for anxious, retaliatory, or fanatical responses to evil.
2. Jesus’ positive approach
Jesus was bighearted and tolerant (1583.4), and he loved all sorts of people. “It seemed to be his purpose in all social situations to teach patience, tolerance, and forgiveness” (1580.8). He focused on the individual and learned to love people (cf. 1098); and his love was based on understanding. Jesus made extraordinary efforts to learn about all sorts of different human beings. When Jesus worked with the best of the religious teachers in Rome, “never once did he attack their errors or even mention the flaws in their teachings. In each case he would select the truth in what they taught and then proceed so to embellish and illuminate this truth in their minds that in a very short time this enhancement of the truth effectively crowded out the associated error” (1456.0; cf. 1592.4). This is a good technique to practice in workshops.
“The Positive Nature of Jesus’ Religion” (1769#5) shows the balance between Jesus’ gentleness and his creative aggressiveness. For example, with the scriptures of his day, Jesus appropriated the best portions and did not mention the rest. His teaching of nonresistance does not mean “to suffer evil without complaint and without resistance.” “The turning of the other cheek, or whatever act that may typify, demands initiative, necessitates vigorous, active, and courageous expression of the believer’s personality.” And ponder the gentle effectiveness of Jesus’ response to the man beating his wife, tapping him on the shoulder, offering marvelously revelatory words, and smiling on him warmly (1470#2). Jesus approached wrongdoers in an attitude of mercy.
Whoever experiences the love of Jesus knows what it is like, and without this foundation, the harder aspects of Jesus’ life and teachings cannot be comprehended or truly applied.
3. Jesus’ inner techniques for processing conflict
We know that dealing with conflict involves “considerable commotion in the philosophic realms of the mind” (1097.5-6). Jesus taught, “All forms of soul conflict consist in the lack of harmony between the moral, or spiritual, self-consciousness and the purely intellectual self-consciousness” (1478.5) and that dangerous conflicts of allegiance are resolved by being wholly dedicated to the Father’s will (1480.4).
Jesus processed conflict in a strikingly effective way. For three years, from age eleven to thirteen, his refusal to take a one-sided solution led to the development of a most serviceable concept. “Throughout this and the two following years Jesus suffered great mental distress as the result of his constant effort to adjust his personal views of religious practices and social amenities to the established beliefs of his parents. He was distraught by the conflict between the urge to be loyal to his own convictions and the conscientious admonition of dutiful submission to his parents. . . . However, he never shirked the responsibility of making the necessary daily adjustments between these realms of loyalty to one’s personal convictions and duty toward one’s family, and he achieved the satisfaction of effecting an increasingly harmonious blending of personal convictions and family obligations into a masterful concept of group solidarity based upon loyalty, fairness, tolerance, and love” (1372.6).
Jesus processed the shock of his first visit to Jerusalem, when he saw the repulsive aspects of the practices surrounding temple by repeatedly retiring for meditation, trying to think things out, and emerged with a superb way of asking and responding to questions in his discussions with the teachers (Paper 125). After the death of Joseph, Jesus spent two years carefully thinking through the forest of problems connected to his future career as a religious teacher (1389#3). He meditated all night, thinking how to deal with the Messianic hopes of his followers, and made the compromise no longer to resist their regarding him as the Messiah (1532.1). For him, prayer was “an avoidance of emotional tension [and] a prevention of conflict” (2089.0). His wholehearted concentration on accomplishing the Father’s will enabled him to process conflict more rapidly than others (1708.3; cf. 1400.7). He took time off for spiritual communion and prayed for assurance and strength in Gethsemane.
4. Jesus’ refusal to defend himself
Upon the outbreak of the Lucifer rebellion, Michael of Nebadon elected to remain aloof, while Gabriel took up the noble task of unceasingly exposing the rebels’ sophistries (605#5). When the Son of Man encountered his universe enemies on Mount Hermon, he simply committed them to “the adjudication of the Judges of a greater universe” (1493.6). Jesus refused to defend himself and taught nonresistance. Even as a youth he was unwilling to fight for his rights (1368.6). And as a prisoner he superbly refused to defend himself (1978-96). How different our public conversations would be if this principle were practiced!
5. Jesus’ avoidance of conflict
After training and ordaining his apostles, Jesus took the team to proclaim their message in Jerusalem. He did not attack the old ways but proclaimed a positive message. When opposition grew hot, he withdrew (1605#8). During the early phase of his public work, Jesus quietly went about taking over the work of John the Baptist (1626.2). After the Nazareth rejection, Jesus used the protective strategy of concealing his message in parables (1689.2). He even entered Jerusalem for his final interaction with his enemies riding on a donkey, a symbol of peace and friendship 1881.3).
Jesus taught others to avoid conflict, too. The Ordination Sermon sets forth the standards for those who would be ambassadors of a future spiritual age (1570#3). The apostles are told, “Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, and pray for those who despitefully use you.” No fleeting benediction, only persistent and heartfelt prayer will fulfill this assignment; love seeks out most those who are most in need of love. The apostles are not to go to law among themselves. They are to remove the log from their own eye before removing the speck from another’s eye. Jesus’ injunction not to judge but to show mercy is coupled with an exhortation “to show just judgment and keen wisdom. Present not that which is holy to dogs, neither case your pearls before swine, lest they trample your gems under foot and turn to rend you.” Jesus warns against false prophets who “come to you in sheep’s clothing, while on the inside they are as ravening wolves.”
Jesus did not make the mistake of letting his philosophy of a friendly universe confuse different levels of perspective (1031.1); he also warned his apostles about the enmity of the world (1946#3). A lucid recognition of what he faced guided his responses. At the same time, he showed the way for those who are “sufficiently intelligent and tolerant to avoid clashes of mind and wars of opinion” (278.3).
One way to avoid conflict is to follow what I call the receptivity principle, sharing truth proportionate to the person’s receptivity for truth, as is shown by the fact that Jesus chose to work among the Jews, even though he anticipated rejection. Moreover, he gave advanced teachings, with the potential for unhelpful controversy, only to advanced questioners, such as Nathaniel, and then only on the condition that they promised not to publicize such teachings (1767#4).
6. Jesus and mediation
What can we learn about mediation (275-79; 411.3,5) from Jesus? “Blessed are the peacemakers,” he said (1575.3). Although Jesus refused to mediate a property dispute and “never meddled with the temporal affairs of even his apostles” (1821#4), he did harmonize the different versions of the gospel taught by his apostles (1658.1) and he taught them not quarrel over their parable interpretations (1698#2), though he did correct their message after their enthusiasm over his resurrection led them away from the center of the gospel (2052.4). When his apostles were having social difficulties with the apostles of John, Jesus rather took his own twelve away for a time of diversion and relaxation (1610#3), saying “You cannot talk men out of their perplexities when they reach such a stage of involvement, and when so many persons with strong feelings are concerned.” The three-day vacation with a moratorium on discussing the troublesome situation proved very beneficial. When the two groups of apostles came together, however, he again refused to preside, though he gave talks on sympathy, cooperation, and tolerance (1624#6). I dream of workshops, conferences, and essay contests devoted to competitive and cooperative efforts to reconstruct imaginatively what Jesus might have said on these themes. During the apostles’ three weeks together, they “learned to differ, to debate, to contend, to pray, and to compromise, and throughout it all to remain sympathetic with the other person’s viewpoint and to maintain at least some degree of tolerance for his honest opinions.” These skills are much needed today. How shall we acquire them except by practice?
7. Jesus’ provision for maintaining order among believers
Jesus, in the most detailed social teaching that he ever gave, provided just such a mechanism for dealing with certain serious problems within a congregation of believers. The Lesson on Forgiveness (1762#1) begins and ends with a parable of forgiveness. The first is the parable of the lost sheep, and the implication is that the purpose of the grievance procedure is to bring back an erring individual into the circuits of the love of the Father’s family. The last parable reminds the hearer that those who have been forgiven much should be merciful toward others. Between these two parables is a strikingly powerful procedure. “If your brother sins against you, go to him and with tact and patience show him his fault. And do all this between you and him alone. If he will listen to you, then have you won your brother. But if your brother will not hear you, if he persists in the error of his way, go again to him, taking with you one or two mutual friends that you may thus have two or even three witnesses to confirm your testimony and establish the fact that you have dealt justly and mercifully with your offending brother. Now if he refuses to hear your brethren, you may tell the whole story to the congregation, and then, if he refuses to hear the brotherhood, let them take such action as they deem wise; let such an unruly member become an outcast from the kingdom. While you cannot pretend to sit in judgment on the souls of your fellows, and while you may not forgive sins or otherwise presume to usurp the prerogatives of the supervisors of the heavenly hosts, at the same time, it has been committed to your hands that you should maintain temporal order in the kingdom on earth. While you may not meddle with the divine decrees concerning eternal life, you shall determine the issues of conduct as they concern the temporal welfare of the brotherhood on earth.” (1762.5)
It takes a new epochal maturity for believers to organize for and practice such a procedure as needed. Without the willingness to undertake this procedure, a group may find itself helpless to prevent individuals who mix good and evil from causing untold problems and even gaining the balance of power in a group.
8. Jesus’ willingness to defend truth
Jesus would stand up for his position when it was attacked. As a child he confronted those who accused him of impiety for drawing a picture of the chazan on the floor of the synagogue school. The Discourse on Sonship and Citizenship (1929#1) is full of pertinent lessons on the balance of gentleness and strength. So long as believers are not required to worship another than God, they should live in peace with the civil rulers. “In every possible way–in everything short of your spiritual allegiance to the rulers of the universe–seek to live peaceably with all men. Be you always as wise as serpents but as harmless as doves.” “You are indeed to be gentle in your dealings with erring mortals, patient in your intercourse with ignorant men, and forbearing under provocation; but you are also to be valiant in the defense of righteousness, mighty in the promulgation of truth, and aggressive in the preaching of this gospel of the kingdom, even to the ends of the earth (1931.5).
Listen to these words to his gospel messengers. “We have made no direct attack upon the persons or upon the authority of those who sit in Moses’ seat; we only offered them the new light, which they have so vigorously rejected. We have assailed them only by the denunciation of their spiritual disloyalty to the very truths which they profess to teach and safeguard. We clashed with these established leaders and recognized rulers only when they threw themselves directly in the way of the preaching of the gospel of the kingdom to the sons of men. And even now, it is not we who assail them, but they who seek our destruction. Do not forget that you are commissioned to go forth preaching only the good news. You are not to attack the old ways; you are skillfully to put the leaven of new truth in the midst of the old beliefs. Let the Spirit of Truth do his own work. Let controversy come only when they who despise the truth force it upon you. But when the willful unbeliever attacks you, do not hesitate to stand in vigorous defense of the truth which has saved and sanctified you.” (1932.1)
Among his chosen messengers, Jesus was more aggressive; note his attack on their superstitions (1680#3) and his rebuke to Peter (1759#7). It is always the Master’s balance that challenges our discernment. He interceded for Kermith, the trance prophet (1666.2), but walked out on the cold reception accorded to him by Annas (1596.2). He defended the right of the strange preacher to teach his odd version of the gospel (1764#2) but blasted the hypocritical religious leaders. The courage needed for such devotion to the truth is available in the spirit (1575.5; 1582.1; 1607#1).
9. Jesus’ conduct of open warfare
There was a militant side to the good shepherd as well, who was prepared to defend his flock even with his life. He taught the love of enemies, but he did not call for spiritual unity with the Sanhedrin, and he disentangled himself from the traitorous embrace of Judas (1974.4).
Many readers see only one side of the concept of tolerance. Jesus was very openhearted and taught tolerance, but not bland permissive acceptance of even sinful conduct (1638-39; 1653.3; 1676.5; 1766.5). “Jesus declared that the heavenly Father is a not a lax, loose, or foolishly indulgent parent who is ever ready to condone sin and forgive recklessness” (1653). The challenge is to distinguish what behaviors are intolerable (2086.6) as opposed to merely irritating and to deal positively and constructively with the former (315.1; 1470#2; 1974.3-4).
Jesus did finally go on the offensive, though not until it was necessary to pre-empt a concerted attack by his enemies who were about to declare open warfare on him (1707#1; 1708.1). But even during this period the Master conducted himself in a manner that was mature, ethically elegant, and spiritually effective .
He dealt only with that evil which was squarely in the path of his mission: “Being thus motivated by a wholehearted singleness of purpose, he was not anxiously bothered by the evil in the world” (1594). His replies to challenging questions were dignified, enlightening, and final. He never let anger infect his righteous indignation. In cleansing the temple, the bloody commerce was simply disorganized; no one’s money was taken, no property was destroyed, and order was restored within a few minutes. After the last temple discourse (1905#1), in which another offer of mercy was combined with the words that “there cannot be peace between light and darkness, between life and death, between truth and error,” Jesus did not incite revolt. He simply walked out with his followers.
The final period in Jesus’ teaching was the time for proclaiming the higher phases of the gospel (1704.5) and for slow, steady, solid, and more spiritual growth (1718.1) of the kingdom. The good shepherd protected his sheep by critiques which clarified the radical issues at stake and by demonstrating the superiority of his spiritual way over the intellectual and physical attacks that his enemies were able to bring against him.
10. Jesus’ way of spiritual brotherhood
In Gethsemane, Jesus prayed for all believers: “I want them all to be one, even as you and I are one. . . . If my children are one as we are one, and if they love one another as I have loved them, all men will then believe that I came forth from you and be willing to receive the revelation of truth and glory which I have made” (1964.3). An expert on church growth, addressing a group of Urantia Book readers, was asked how they could spread their movement. “Love one another” was his immediate reply.
Jesus has shown the way of spiritual brotherhood by the love that pervaded his thoughts, words, and deeds. He demonstrated in his life what he proclaimed in his gospel–the spiritual brotherhood, the kingdom of heaven (1702.3; 1710.3). And he instructed his apostles to maintain spirit unity, which “you can experience in the joy of your united dedication to the wholehearted doing of the will of my Father in heaven. . . . . Spiritual unity is derived from the consciousness that each of you is indwelt, and increasingly dominated, by the spirit gift of the heavenly Father. Your apostolic harmony must grow out of the fact that the spirit hope of each of you is identical in origin, nature, and destiny” (1591#5; 1672.6; 1091.6). “In this brotherhood of Jesus there is no place for sectarian rivalry, group bitterness, nor assertions of moral superiority and spiritual infallibility” (2085.6; 1092#6). The study of the history of Christianity uncovers betrayals of truth and goodness that have marked conflicts over the centuries; things even got to a point where further growth was incompatible with unity (1010.3). All this makes it even more striking that all Jesus’ followers are called to spiritual brotherhood, even with those whose theologies contain offensive elements and with people whose groups have done harm to interests of one’s own group.
Once I gathered with a very diverse group of readers in an approximation of the Edenic Sabbath outlined on 832.6. After the scheduled period of worship I had planned to give a brief talk on the topic of spiritual unity; but after the worship was concluded, we were for a while in such a state of unity that to discuss the topic at that moment would have been absurd. Clearly, spiritual unity among members of all religions is to be found in the worship of God (715-16; 722#6; 1010.4; 1012.5; 1091.6; 1133.1). In searching The Urantia Book in quest of guidance for realizing spiritual unity, one finds that what is most emphasized is improving the individual’s relationship with God.
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